Monday, October 9, 2017

Yesterday...

Yesterday, I had the honor of speaking at a fundraiser event for Compassion Pregnancy Center called Pearls of Wisdom.  I had prepared a speech that showed examples of how God has provided for our needs throughout the years.  And boy has He ever.  We also attended our annual Service of Remembrance for our Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support Group.

 I came to two realizations yesterday.  One..we participate in this support group primarily to support  the new families and we are honored to do so.  We've reached a point that we don't need our feelings and our loss validated as much as we did in the earlier days of grieving.  It is also nice to reflect on Stephanie's life in the company of those who truly understand.  The second realization is while telling our story, it's almost like I'm telling someone else's story.  I rarely get emotional about it.  It occurred to me yesterday that it may be because I am no longer the person I was then.  Mostly in good ways.  Even in the ways that weren't so good in the beginning, God has turned them to good. 

So if you are reading this and you are earlier in your grief journey, I want to offer you hope.  Hope that it can get better.  If it's been a little (or a lot) longer and you still struggle, let me tell you the saying "time heals all wounds" is an outright lie.  While time may allow the wound to scab over a bit so that it doesn't feel so raw, it's God that does the healing.  Healing comes at different times for different people.   Please don't mistake this post as suggesting where you should be.  I am where I am by God's grace.  I never expected to heal like this.  Perhaps you haven't put your faith and trust in the Lord.  I'd love to share the hope I have in Christ with you.