Tuesday, September 16, 2014

It has been too long...

It has been so long since I updated this.  Most of you keep up with me on Facebook so I kind of let this go because we have been so busy.  We moved our family in early June and spent most of May (and June really) packing.  We've been trying to get settled in our new home since.  We've had to find a new church and new places to shop.  Nothing is close by.  Life is crazy.  The older kids have started school so I have a little extra time during naptime to get back to blogging.  I am still working on my Doula class.  I've finished the training part and am now working on the book reports and project that need to be completed in order to be credentialed.  I have had the honor of helping a few families online through the loss of their babies.  It truly is an honor.  I am looking forward to getting credentialed so that I can minister to more families.

Today is the 16th, which means it's 26 months since Stephanie was born.  Surprisingly, the last couple of months (August and September) the 15th and 16th have come and gone with little to no emotion.  It does still creep up randomly, regardless of the date, and is triggered by unexpected things (one of which is the smell of freshly laid blacktop, because our street was resurfaced the week that she died).  There is not one day that passes that I don't think of her at some point.  Often many points.  Usually without tears.  She is thought about, she is talked about.  She is not forgotten.  We don't dwell in the sadness.  For us, she is part of our forever family and we treat her as such.  Our girls are tender hearted and well adjusted.  They have experienced something that no child should have to.  But they are not damaged.  They are great!

Until today, I hadn't been inspired to write much.  I share a lot of brief thoughts and encouraging posts on Facebook, but just didn't have anything meaningful enough to write about.  I'm hoping to do better about that.  So until next time...